I spoke with my Dr. regarding the upcoming pet scan next week and he gave me statistics that were somewhat difficult to hear. He said there's a 50% chance of new lesions and the tumor not necessarily growing but still alive and in the same position as when they found it.
To me this is not good news and I'm having a hard time with it. These may be the statistics but I just can't believe that is what is going on inside my body. Maybe he feels the need to tell me what he sees as the "norm" to not get my hopes up too high. I certainly haven't forgotten what he told us during the last cat scan and what it meant that the effusion had disappeared . . . that has to count for something. He admitted it did count for something as does my attitude and the way I've been handling the chemo, looking good and feeling good especially given the strong cocktail I'm on.
I'm just going to have to wait and see. Not easy, never easy but I must continue to focus on the good things and the fact that every turn we've taken during this journey has offered good news.
Screw the statistics! Here's my best medicine,
Benjamin as the Tin Man
Until next time.
8 comments:
Dear Shelly,
I was going to try and write some uplifting thoughts to you, but hell, I can only try and imagine what you are going through and your family. I do know you have strength you don't know you have!
Know as always everyone is thinking of you.
You have beaten the odds before!
"You go girl"
Hugs,
P&C
Hi Shelly. Your Doctor has to tell you the down side. But he does not know the real Shelly Beth Waxman, like we do. You are winning over this, I just know it deep down and you have to keep that thought upper most in that pretty little temporarily hairless mind of yours. I love you, we all do and everyone, and folks you do not know are praying for you. You will beat this yet.Love uncle Ernie
Dear Shelly, I can certainly imagine how you felt today hearing these words from your doctor. Not easy to listen to. Doctors can be wonderful but they also usually cover their behinds. When you think of how really well you have been feeling and how effective the combination of chemo, cucumber fish, love and positive thinking have been, you know that you are on a very positive path. But we know that it isn't easy and there will surely be some emotional ups and downs as you travel this path. Hold on tight - the roller coaster is moving ahead! We are all holding on with you. Much love, Alice
That means so much...Thank you.
Hi Shelly, Where I come from we used to say, "The best defense is a good offense." Well, you certainly have a great offense and a wonderful group of friends and family as teammates. WAYTOGOGAL!
Hutch & Lore
Shelly,
The more I think about your doctor's comments from yesterday, the more annoyed I get. He had no need to say what he said - no need to warn you of what could possibly show up. It served no good purpose (except for him perhaps) and could only serve to undermine your fantastically strong and positive outlook. If I were there I would tell him that he had done you a real disservice. We all have to rely on our health care providers and we become rightfully dependent on them to guide us. I think as a result we are reluctant to tell them when they misspeak or say things that don't do us any good. Maybe if you are comfortable telling him how unnecessarily he upset you, you can prevent his doing this in the future. You could tell him that you are fully aware of what is involved in your treatment etc., but that you don't need "warnings." It is hard enough to deal with discouraging news if there should be any but you sure don't need to anticipate what may not happen anyway. Sorry for ranting. I hope you don't mind my expressing this to you. Love, Alice
Dear Shelly, I did not see Benjamin's show when I responed to your blog yesterday. I listened to it to day and was pleased he did so well, It is a difficult song to sing..he did it well. I guess his silver pants gave him a little tsoreass(ask dad) at the onset. Also I have a great idea. In view of your doc's comments yesterday, or Monday, If Benjamin is done with his costume, especially the pointed funnel chapeau...why not give it to the dr. and tell him to use it as a chair....Love, Uncle E
Dear Shelly. Your uncle Ernie got it right. Give that pointed funnel that Benjamin wore for a hat to your doctor and tell him to sit on it.
AND you've got it right. Screw the stats. Stay positive.
Love, Cousin Sumner.
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